As he was caressing me one evening, I started to drop in and out of my awareness of the present moment.
When I was in, I could feel the touch on my skin, the fragrance of incense, the candle lights and music. When I choose to drop out, and started to think about the following day, nothing really mattered. Not even his touch. Suddenly, I couldn’t feel anything.
The circumstances didn’t change.
What changed was my presence, the quality of my awareness.
Then, when I was fully into the experience, I started to amplify my source of pleasure : my presence. I wouldn’t ask for the touch to change, I would simply move and breathe to amplify my capacity to receive.
Pleasure was sourced from within me: I was choosing to relax. To receive. To open my senses more and more.
For a while I observed the difference in intensity and length of pleasure, without asking anything, just receiving.
The next stage was about asking for specific ways of touch, eye contact or even music. Yet still, I was the one asking how and what i wanted to receive.
What was incredible liberating for me is to experience pleasure from within.
An experience I can choose to have at any given moment. I don’t even need a partner (you neither!) : it’s not his task to “give me pleasure”.
I can choose to create a pleasure experience with food, taking a shower, cooking or working.
How to claim your inner source of pleasure.
The #1 condition we need in order to access our inner source of pleasure and then open our capacity to receive, is a feeling of SAFETY.
Safe to feel all the feelings that will be present as you choose to relax and open. The experience of safety is highly personal. It depends not only on the external circumstances; through my work I came to see that safety is highly defined by the information in our inner landscape. Our cells.
Bodies have intimate memories of hurt, pain or trauma, both ancestral or from the present incarnation, that will impact directly how each one of us define and experience safety.
Bodies that still have frozen areas to be healed, have less space for Soul to fully incarnate therefore less capacity for Soul nourishing pleasure.
To restore feelings of inner and outer safety, I invite you to tend to your roots and look at the Mother and Father wounds. By simply asking yourself how did you feel expressing yourself as a child ? Memories can be triggered from within.
Answers can also be found when observing, free of judgment, the circumstances that trigger feelings of unsafety : what’s the root cause of this feeling ?
Feeling safe is the primordial condition, then, for our nervous system to relax, open to receive. For our voice to express what we need, want or don’t want. For our body to move and for us to create the life, relationship and work that brings us most pleasure.
Permission to feel pleasure.
If pleasure is not a selfish act. If pleasure is source of energy, vitality and creativity :
Who would you be in your family, work and life showing up deeply nourished and inspired ?
Give yourself permission to find pleasure in simple things in your day : don’t need to ADD activities to your agenda. In fact, most probably you need to REMOVE those which don’t bring pleasure.
Ask : what brings me pleasure ?
Stay present and notice what is revealed for you.
If you feel called to expand the vitality and creativity in your life, I’m giving single Soul Alchemy Sessions : 2 hours to co-create a powerful, deep and liberating alchemical space for your Soul and Body. »»» read more about the Soul Alchemy Sessions here.
With love and gratitude, co-creating a world that feels safe to love, thrive and connect just being all that we are.